I had a conversation with a new acquaintance last night. In our conversation the topic of relationships came up. (Full disclaimer: I love Love, and I love relationships and all talk concerning the two.)
He asked me why I was single, and how long I'd been single for. Honestly? The second of the two questions threw me for a loop. I know why I'm single, but TWO YEARS?! If you know me, you know that that is way outside of my character as I'm never usually without a handsome beau on my arm....My bestie has nicknamed me 'Taylor Swift'...
Within the last two years, I lived in China, I traveled the South East Asian coast and I taught English. I headlined a stage production, I hit (and maintained) my target weight, and I started a new career journey (among other things that I'll share in later posts). It's not to say that these things could not be completed had I been in a relationship. I will say, however, that I was so busy enjoying me and life that I didn't even notice how much time had passed with my being solo.
I want to say this, and make this triumphantly clear. I am happy. The last two years of my life has been the toughest, have matured me in insurmountable ways, and I would not have traded them in for a relationship. I needed and am grateful for this time I've had to spend with me.
Our society and culture place so much pressure on individuals to be in relationships and to find love. Tinder, Bumble, Plenty of Fish, Match, etc, are all in place to assist us in our hunt. However, I think it is so important for you to know who you are, what you can contribute to a relationship, and what you expect from your partner in a relationship before you get into one.
Taking time for you is paramount. You need to. You need to learn things about yourself more than you think you already know. And although cliche, I could not have learned certain things about myself had I been wrapped up in a relationship or constantly dating. I needed a clear mind to be able to better assess myself.
Relationships are beautiful and wonderful things. They deserve understanding, respect and a lot of nurturing.
If you're reading this and you're single, know that this is an extremely crucial and amazing opportunity for you. Take this time to complete some personal inventory. Figure yourself out so when the next relationship comes your way, you'll be ready.