'Going Under' - Toxic Relationships PT. 2 (5 Tell-Tale Signs You're In One)

 
 

So we've already discussed the importance of getting to know as much as we can about someone before we commit to a relationship with them. But, now that you're in one, how do you know if it has become toxic, or not?

Of course there are the more obvious of signs like big angry blowouts, physical abuse, or belligerent name-calling. However, take a look at these 5 less obvious signs that your relationship could be toxic and needs some doctoring. 

  1. You have trust issues. Pay attention to your feelings of doubt. Whether they come from a place of insecurity or just plain concern, it means there is a need to investigate the feeling further. 
  2. You constantly fear doing something wrong. Every relationship will have moments where either party will feel as though they've upset the other. But when the feeling becomes one that constantly haunts you, there is a problem.
  3. Your friends make comments. Don't discount the importance of your friends. They know you, and can see you and your interactions with the world from a different vantage point. If they begin noticing negative differences in your behavior or perhaps in the interaction between you and your special person, take heed. 
  4. There's consistent negative energy. Energy is real; there's no mystery there. Even animals and babies will sense a bad atmosphere and react to how it makes them feel. Negative energy once-in-a-while is normal. It's a part of a balance in life that is necessary. However, if you find that the balance in the energy of your relationship has shifted more to the negative side, and lingers there, watch out. 
  5. You have unrelenting feelings of contempt. Contempt is an emotion to watch because it is an emotion that is active. It moves far past just being upset. It is a motion to disrespect; to neglect; to disregard; to hate. If you find yourself holding your significant other in contempt, there is a real issue. 

Take note that these signs listed above will present themselves as a combination. For example, feelings of contempt will bring the energy in a room to a negative level. The importance here is for you to be cognizant of the relationship you are in. Be weary of issues, and address them as necessary.

 

 

Xxxo,

-s